Merry Merry Quite Contrary how does the story go?




ok kiddos, so it’s that time again.  that time where i say “hey, i’m going to be a healthier version of me”.  and then i talk about what i want to do and how i plan on being better.  hopefully, for all of you kids out there that are in a similar boat this is helpful.  for those of you that aren’t or that have no interest in this sort of blog post, suck it.  haha, kidding.  sort of.


so when you think about what all goes into being “a healthier version” there are a few key things one thinks about…food, physical activity, and general lifestyle. 


first up…food…

for the most part, i’ve been really good about this.  i’d say about 75% of the time i’ve been eating yummy, healthy good-for-me food.  in the past few months, i’ve drastically decreased my fast food intake.  and i’m slowly giving up my love affair with potatoes.  main problem for me is that when i cave, i cave big time.  so moderation, thou art a bitch.  so now i’m steppin up my game.  potatoes, it’s officially over.  doneski.  you don’t love me as much as i love you, and that ain’t cool.  i’m dating a new type of potato…his name is sweet potato.  and it’s really nothin serious, just a few dates every once in a while.  so booyah.  oh yeah, and when i do decide to kick it with a “bad for me” meal, “moderation” is my new middle name.



secondly…physical activity…

no more excuses.  i’m done with them.  they are dead to me. 

secretly, i want to be a runner & a cyclist.  like, in a big bad way.  i have no idea.  and i’m definitely not a runner.  at all.  except in my dreams.  but let’s face it, people who run look cool.  and they talk about this “zen” that they get from running.  and i want to be one of those people.  i want to look cool & be in a zen state while looking cool. 

see? doesn't that rando person look cool??

added bonus, working out is good for me.  and i am most def on the official hunt for an older men’s 10 speed…for when i wanna bike in a zippy, non leisurely manner.  but really, i just want to get off my ass & do something.  walk, run, jog, bike, disc golf, gym, whatevs.  so “getting off my ass and being active” is my new middle name.



lastly…general lifestyle….

get ready for this.  it’s kinda big.  i’m taking a zack morris time out from drinking.  yowza.  i don’t know for how long.  just for a while.  i don’t need those extra calories, i don’t need to drink to enjoy the company of my friends, and i don’t ever ever ever want to be a sad, schwastey pants almost 30 yr old.  i don’t plan to be a totes teetotaler forever, just for a bit.  cuz let’s face it, i’ve been a bit of a partier for a minute.  not on the alcoholic level, trust.  but my party tiara has seen quite a few parties.  so…for a while, my new middle name is “soda water, extra lime, hold the booze please”.




how do ya like that?  my new official name is Meredith Moderation Getting Off My Ass And Being Active Soda Water, Extra Lime, Hold the Booze Please Contrary. 

if you can say that whole name fast 5 times, then you deserve this high five


so, i will be updating you with this every so once in a while.  i plan on rocking it.


ok, ok, ok…so while all fo the above is 100% true, and a big part of the reason why i’m starting this, i must admit something.  i tried to sneak past this reason, but, well, you lovely readers have been with me for a little over a year and i just can’t lie to you.  so here was the real motivator for starting all of this.  are you ready?

*sigh* i want these real bad

BAM!  yes, i really really really want to rock these overalls this summer.  i know, it’s a little “tooooooralooooratooooralooooralie! c’mon eileen!” but i don’t give a flying fuck.  i want to rock overalls all effin summer long.  only problem is, if you do the math… fat bank + overalls = faux FUPA.  and while i can rock a fat bank like no one’s business, i absolutely REFUSE to rock a FUPA.  especially if it’s not a real one, just an illusion.  so yes, the main inspiration is materialistic.  but hey, all of the other reasons and benefits are good ones. 

and the main point is that i’m going to do something about it.  so there you go.


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holy bananas.  it’s a new freakin year.  i survived ‘010!  i really did!!  had a few bumps and bruises on the way, and a lot of amazingness in-between.  so here’s (belated) well wishes to ya…

and by now, the festivities are well over.  the house party at KKs house was delightfully stupendous, as it has been for the past 3 years.  there were hats, beers, a yummy chicken enchilada soup that yours truly made, champagne, party poppers, noise makers, a bonfire, high kicks, and friends in abundance.

and by now, all of the glitz and sparkle of New Year’s Eve festivities has settled

and the recycling people are hard at work all around the city (i hope you recycled!  save the planet and whatnot!)

and by now, everyone is probably beginning their New Year’s Resolution list.  you know, the one most people (like me) are dreading.  the one that goes “i’m going to lose [fill in the blank] lbs”, and “i’m going to stop [fill in the blank]” and “i’m going to start [fill in the blank]” lists.


i started a list.  a good intentioned list.  one full of awesome things that i’m just going to kick ass at.  dude, this list was killer.  like:

  • i’m going to totally work out.  like all the time (again).
  • i’m going to stop eating like shit (again).
  • i’m going to be very very very good with my money.  i’m even going to start a savings account…one that i don’t dip into when i see that super-fabulous-i-must-have-it-right-this-second dress/shoes/sweater/hat
  • i’m going to keep an impeccably clean house
  • i’m going to cook!  and cook fancy pants things!
  • i’m going to become a disc golf b’dass
  • i’m going to go to sleep before 11:30pm on a regular basis
  • i’m going to run a marathon
  • i’m going to learn how to change my own oil in my car
  • i’m going to give back to my community
  • i’m actually going to meet my neighbors (it’s only been 3+ years, might as well say hi)
  • i’m going to check my mail on a daily basis
  • i’m going to play the upright bass again
  • i’m going to cure world hunger
  • i’m going to
  • i’m going to
  • i’m going to

just cross out the "2009" and make it "2011"...half my resolutions are carried over from that long ago anyway

ugh.  new year’s resolutions.  such a pain in my ass.  i know half of it i’m going to forget in about…mmm…maybe 3 months?  ok, who am i kidding, in like 1 month.  ok Ok OK…i’ve already forgotten half of them.

so i’ve made that list.  i’ve tried to cut it down to the actual ones that i want to follow up on.  but who knows what ‘011 will have in store for me?  if anything, i’ve learned that i cannot know for certain how things will end up.  ‘010 started off a cruel bitch of a year, got better, had a few dips, but ultimately wound up being a pretty ok-ish great year (just don’t tell it i said that!)

so.  i’m going to crumple up that giant list i made.  that’s right.  i’m going to just make one, giant goal for this New Year’s Resolution.  and that goal is to LAUGH.  a lot.  unapologetically.  loudly.  borderline obnoxiously.  and very very often.

because this year, i’m not going to set any big great expectations.  the only thing i’m going to do is have fun, and enjoy being a Meredith in this big crazy world.

see? i'm already having a blast in my green plaid giant shirt!


 i’m going have a blasty blast in ‘011.  that’s a fact, jack.

hopefully you will too.  Happy New Year, my friends.  it’s going to be rocktastic.

oh, and what the crap am i going to rename the blog?!?!?