Merry Merry Quite Contrary how does the story go?

THE FOLLIES OF A MEREDITH IN OKC


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A BUSY BEE INDEED

is it really almost october?  like, october is really going to happen next week?  because i feel like september just started a day ago.  how can i blink and a whole month be gone?  did someone kick on a time accelerator or something and forget to tell me?  and why do i never get these memos…first gravity was increased and now time is sped up…i need to get on that mailing list stat.

 

things have just been insanity lately.  in a good way.  in a “busy bee” way.  and goodness knows i love to stay busy…there is nothing more boring than being bored.  between work, bicycle riding, work, photography, friends, family, working out, and work the days have melted into weeks and now almost into a month.  did you know that i have like 2 weeks worth of stuff on my DVR that hasn’t even been viewed?!  i have ben a busy bee indeed.

ok, so i did take the time to make a picture of a busy bee...guess i wasnt' all that busy today

take this weekend, for example.  friday, i was off of work but i shot a wedding with KK.  then yesterday i had to open the booth at the fair, left the state fair and headed up to the northside to be apart of Megan’s Wedding Dress Shopping support team (her dress is disgustingly beautiful, btw…she is going to look gorgeois!), seconds away from my destination i realized that i forgot to pick up the deposit from the state fair so i had to turn around, then scramble back up to the northside, then pick up mr bix from mom’s, shower & change, then go out for the Ax’s Farewell party at mcnellies. 

 

whew.  it was a great day though.  just packed full of events.  few side comments about the state fair…

 

the state fair.  oh me, oh my.  it was excellent mullet hunting this year.  i saw a skullet, a femme mullet, a child mullet, and a whole freakin family of mullets complete with dirty overalls.  here’s an example of a fabulous mullet…

it's a "silver fox" mullet

 i also talked with a travelling carnival worker who told me that he travelled all of the 52 states.  hmm…interesting…did we add 2 states?  did i miss this too?

it was also kinda sad…i did not get to enjoy my favorite fair-time treat of corn on the cob drenched in butter.  i simply did not have time to find the right booth.  but oh well.  i did have a delish cup of Dippin Dots: ice cream of the future.  but one of my fellow fair-ites did bring up a good point: they’ve been “ice cream of the future” for a while now.  how futuristic are the really?  i told him not to speak such profanity…Dippin Dots were so far ahead of the future that we’re just now catching up.  i mean, c’mon!!  they are tiny little dots of ice cream in different flavors that meld together to create a “banana split”.  that is future enough for me.

 

ok, enough of the fair talk. 

 

in other news, miss emmaline jelly bean has a flat tire. 

it was very very sad.  Gordy and I had biked up to mcnellies for a frosty bev and a burger.  it was nice to take a leisurely ride on my favoritest of bicycles.  but when we got done with mcnellies time, and unlocked the bikes from the rail i noticed an odd noise.  i looked down.  and her tire was flat.  flat flat flat.  no chance of temporary revival for the ride home.  i almost cried. 

kid, i know exaclty how ya feel.

the ride back is the best part!  it’s pretty much all down hill (and there is one hill in particular that is straight up awesome), it’s nice and breezy and moonlighty, and i’m just sliiiiightly tipsy so everything seems crisp and new and extra fun.  but alas.  i had to miss this part.  i had to call KK to see if she’d come back and pick me and emmaline jelly bean up.  luckily, she is a fantastic Knight in Shining Armor.  Thanks, KK for saving us.  now i just gotta take my leisurely lady into the bicycle dr to get her patched up.  poor emmaline jelly bean.

 

i also think i might get a 2nd bicycle.  like an older men’s 10 speed road bike.  not to replace miss emmaline jelly bean…never that.  just to give me a speedier option for those longer rides (especially ones with lots of hills!).  i borrowed an awesome one from Ldawg when i was down in dallas.  i felt pretty b’dass while riding.  see…i neeed two bikes.  i really do.  emmaline jelly bean for when i’m feeling dainty and leisurely.  then the other one for when i’m feelin like being speedy and b’dass and havin lots of ‘tude.  only problem is that all the awesome ones i find are for people who are 6’ or taller.  and, well, those don’t really work for someone who’s 5’6″.  so i’ll keep perusing craigslist…and if ya know of any rad men’s 10 speed that’s looking for a good owner, lemme know.


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SWISS FAMILY MERRYSON

ok, seriously…how cool would it be to live in a treehouse?  i don’t mean like the kind that you had as a kid.  i’m talkin about a tricked out treehouse.  one with indoor plumbing and spectacular tree top views.

the answer: very.

 

i know i’m the queen of random.  but there really was a train of thought that got me to this new fascination with arboreal dwellings.

 

here’s how it went…the other night i stayed at the Colcord with KK.  she had booked a suite for a photo shoot and had the hotel room for the night.  so of course we had to have a fancy pants evening at the Colcord.  Gordy and even the Unicorn (that’s you SC-W!  you’re elusive like a unicorn.  and pretty too.  when you’re not being a pain in my ass!  haha, love ya chicky) joined for a decadent dinner at La Baguette (the one in the Colcord). 

 

good golly miss molly, that dinner was f to the d.  freakin delish.  it’s been a while since i’ve thrown my food budget to the wind and ponied up the big bucks for a filet mignon.  but i did.  and it was so worth it.  oh!  and we had oysters too…i’ve never in my life had them before.  must say, i am a fan. 

not the best pic, but ya get the idea.

 

ok, back on track…

so brimsy and i were talking about the nicer hotels that we’ve stayed in.  which made me bring up Hotel Zaza in Dallas TX and how i liked how they had “themes” that were executed exquisitely.  which brimsy then brought up his friend’s hotel im Mississippi (man, i love spelling Mississippi!).  which then made me think of when i stayed at Biras Creek with the fam.  which then made me think of costa rica.  which then made me think of how they had a hotel that had treehouse suites.  which then made me google ‘treehouse hotels’. 

 

so, there you have it.  i am now obsessed with the idea of staying in a treehouse.  here are a few super cool hotels i found…

first up, Tsala Treetop Lodge, which is in South Africa just between Plettenberg Bay and Knysna.

this is the Tsala Treetop Lodge

check out the freakin bathtub…and yes, this is all in the treetop.  insanity.

are you kidding me? seriously?!

 

the next place i found is also ridic.  it’s in South China.  i couldn’t find any pics of the rooms, but just look at this treehouse?  it looks awesome.

Sanya Nanshan Treehouse

 

unfortunately, i will not be traveling to South Africa or southern China anytime soon.  but, i’m still in a world of fascination with the whole treehouse thing.  so i looked up some pics of crazy awesome tree houses.  i am a slacker of a researcher though, and have zero clue where these magnificent tree houses reside.  but oh well…here they are anyway…

not only is it a treehouse, but it's ALSO a sphere. uber cool.

and a little more traditional…

i love love love the interior of this. so rad.

 

 

now i have to find a big tree that can hold up my treehouse.  and someone to build it for me, cuz if i was left to build it that shit would fall apart in 2 seconds.  oh, not to mention the money to pay for it.  and, let’s be honest, i have to get over my little-more-than-slight discomfort with heights. 

but hey, it could happen…right?  party at the treehouse!  i’ll send out the invitations in, like, well, hmm….


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OH GRAVITY

apparently gravity has it out for me today.

 

last night, my bedside chandelier came crashing down.  it scared the crap outta Mr Bix, which of course made me wake up in fright…arms a flailin and my heart racing.  is there a burglar?  is there a ghost?  what is it, Mr Bix?  did timmy fall into a whale?

nope, just my chandelier.  RIP, 7 little glass teardrops and a quarter-sized chunk of the ceiling.

 

then, while i was taking a shower this morning, my shower curtain came crashing down.  Mr Bix wasn’t so scared this time, he was still fast asleep in the bed.  but I was startled…once again the arms were a flailin and water was a splashin while i tried to put the shower curtain back into place.

 

THEN, while i was walking down the stairs, i somehow slip and I came crashing down.  well, more like i slid my way down the stairs.  luckily, i’m totally fine.  i’m always worried that one time (yes, i’ve slid down the stairs multiple times), i’m going to break my leg or something.  fingers crossed this never happens.

 do did someone turn up gravity today? is it no longer 9.81 m/s²?  why do i never get these memos?

me, on a more regular basis than i care to admit


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THE YMCA IS RAININ DOWN LIFE LESSONS

as i previously posted, i have decided to start working out at the conveniently located YMCA before i go in to work.  i’ve been pretty good about this…not stellar…but for a first week (and one that was banana-crazy pants), my attendance was acceptable.  i made it there 2 times.  ok, so that’s really kinda horrible attendance…but it was more times than i’ve been in the past 2 months so i’ll let it slide.

   

in those 2 work outs, i have learned and observed quite a bit.  and i thought i’d share.  here we go…. 

   

1) shower shoes 

it’s been a long while since i’ve used a community shower…since my sophomore year of college and the *gasp!* sorority house to be exact.  i had packed my shower kit…travel size shampoo and conditioner, check.  travel size soap (from the hotel zaza in dallas, tre chic!), check.  travel size face wash, check.  cute travel case to transport all the travel sized stuff, check.  after my work out, i went to the shower room, claimed my little stall and got ready to rinse off the sweat.  i was shampooing my hair and was looking down at my feet.  then i glanced to the left and i could see the person in the stall next to me’s feet under the stall divider.   

cue up the song: “one of these things is not like the other…” 

i was missing my flip flops!  ack!  i’m going to get athlete’s foot!  or feet!  or something!  and then i felt nervous that people would notice that i didn’t have on shower shoes and would think that i was spreading athlete’s foot!  ack.  dangit.  how could i have forgotten about them?!? 

they actually have shower shoes you can buy...but i don't think i'll be rockin this particular style

 

   

i remembered to pack my older pair of flip flops for the next gym visit.  i felt much better about the shower situation. 

   

2)  slow lane is the right lane 

there is a walking/running track that goes around all the exercise equipment.  the edmond Y is set up a little different from the one i’m used to, you actually go up stairs and then *BAM!* there’s the walking/running track that you have to cross to get to the island of torture…er…i mean exercise equipment.   

so first day, i’m walking up…still pretty groggy due to the early hour, and not expecting this track thing.  i almost collided with a fast walkin 80 yr old.  he was clad in a track suit and zooming around the track like a wrinkled blur.  i just barely stepped back off the track before he slammed into me. 

ok, ok…so that’s a total lie.  he was a few feet away, and i saw him approaching.  i did the whole “do i cross or don’t i cross” dance, then took 2 quick, determined strides across.  there was no chance of really running into him.  but it woulda been funny if it did.  but he was indeed wearing a track suit.  it was red, in case you were wondering. 

i spent the next 40 minutes watching the old man and another lady walk around the track.  when the old man would approach the lady (she was going at a leisurely pace and this old dude was bookin it), he’d yell out “on your left!”.  it helped pass the time. 

   

3)  closed captioning is not always accurate 

i really feel for the people that have to rely on closed captioning.  i really really do.  in the 40 minutes i was there, i counted 17 mistakes.  17.  it drove me crazy.  i can’t stand grammatical errors and people using the wrong word (like the “there, their and they’re”).  on the plus side, it did distract me from actually having to watch the Today Show.  that show is horrible.  seriously, it’s just awful.   

woopsie!

 

 sidenote: i do acknowledge that i do not properly capitalize my words on this blog, and that i use both incomplete sentences as well as run-on sentences.  however, i’m not trying to accurately depict what is being said on the tv.  so there!  

4)  8am is the “golden oldies” hour 

wowza.  i think there were maybe, maybe 3 people at the gym that were around my age.  mostly, it was way older ladies and gents.  my guess is that the median age was around 67, with a few soccer moms sprinkled here and there. 

 

which is totally fine with me…i don’t really want to be sweatin away at the über (embarrassingly slow because i’m so out of shape) speed of 3.7 on the treadmill next to some divinely handsome eligible man.  or next to one of the obnoxiously perfect gym princesses (who are looking to catch the eye of the divinely handsome eligible man) in her head-to-toe matching spandex and full makeup. 

when i go to the gym, i’m there to work out.  i’m in a well aged t-shirt (good thing i saved all of those *gasp!* sorority tshirts…they’re finally good for something) and sweatpants or yoga pants.  and it’s nice to know that i don’t have to feel self concious…the golden oldies don’t care.  not one bit. 

5)  water aerobics seems like it’s kick ass 

speaking of the golden oldies, at 8am there is a water aerobics class.  they’re done when i’m finished working out too, so there’s this group of older ladies who are all good friends just chatting away when i get to the locker room.  i must say, i thought it was really awesome.  i mean, these ladies were really great friends and you can tell that they’re just having a blast.   

it made me think of the far far far future, when i’m a golden oldie with all of my friends.  and how we should all go to a water aerobics class too.  i think that would be great…so, who’s with me?  who wants to join a water aerobics class with me in the year ‘050?   

i call dibs on the bright old-lady-flowery swimsuit!!

 

oh, and one other thing…those ladies are not shy at all.  they need to work on their “deck changing” skill.  i think i’m a little scarred for life.   

   

   

    

so there ya go.  the YMCA is a very entertaining.  very entertaining indeed.


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THE EARLY BIRD GETS TO WORKOUT

yes, my friends, it’s that time again.  the time where i assess the fat bank and determine what it is i’ve done well, and what it is i haven’t done so well.
 

let’s start with the good part first…

ladies and gentleman, i will have you know that i’ve been eating at home 90% of the time since i braved the grocery store.  it’s totally true.  i’m not lyin at all.  i’ve been good about drinking a breakfast shake of some sorts, bringing a lunch to work, and eating dinner at home (hey, it counts if it’s at KKs house too).  aren’t you so proud of me?  i feel like an almost grown up!

and “fast food” restaurants?  a thing of the past!  i’ve only been to one…it was chick-fil-a and i got a salad, so that’s not very bad at all. 

finally, i have been coca-cola classic free for 13 days.  a big improvement over the 2-a-day habit i had to kick.  seriously.  it was that bad!  instead, it’s unsweet iced tea (i like it straight up, no sugar or sugar-like substance in my tea…i’m intense like that), la croixs, and good ole fashioned H20. 

not gonna lie, looking at all that makes me very happy.  i feel very accomplished.

i definitely think i deserve one of these.

so….the not so good part.

working out…say what?

  

so, i have 2 gym memberships.  seriously.  i do…hey, one’s only $25 a month and the other is like $30, so it’s kinda like 2 for the price of 1 fancy pants gym..right?

after much discussion and debate with Ldawg about why i just can’t seem to get my ass to the gym, i think i have found the reason.  i don’t have enough willpower…specifically to go to the gym instead of hanging out with friends after work.  i can’t help it!  i’m just a social person!  and if given the option to hang out and play cards vs. sweating my ass off on the treadmill and potentially falling off, i will choose my friends.  hands down.  is it even a question?  the treadmill scares me!  and rightly so, i am very accident prone.

not gonna lie, i'm genuinely scared this'll be me one day

but i have a plan.  oh yes sirree i have a plan.  to avoid having to make the decision between working out and chillaxin with my friends, i’m goin to work out BEFORE i go to work.  see, if i wake up at 7:30 i can get to the gym that’s right down the street from work by 8.  then cardio, pump some iron for an hour or so.  get my shower on.  then head to work.  sounds like a pretty good plan, huh?  the only forseeable issue is that i hate mornings.  but 7:30 isn’t that early…i guess.  and who knows, maybe i’ll get super ripped and join the American Gladiators.  but i wanna be like the old school ones, not the new version.  i’ll get some super rad name like “Blaze”.  oh, wait, there was a Blaze.  whatever, i’ll take over her name.

and i DEF need those socks and shoes, not to mention the killer outfit and bleached out hair

ok, odds are i won’t look like that.  but ya never know…i just might.

 

 

oh, and i created a blog for my photos that i be snappin.  figured it’d be a better way for people i don’t know to see my work than on this blog.  check it out if ya wanna… http://meredithblackphotoblog.wordpress.com