Merry Merry Quite Contrary how does the story go?

THE FOLLIES OF A MEREDITH IN OKC

WHY CAN’T LIFE BE LIKE MY FAVORITE BOOK?!

2 Comments

oh me, oh my.  i have had a no good very bad day.  like  the big-time day of ultimate sucktasticness.  which leads me to two questions.

 

question number one:   why is it socially unacceptable to drink at work?  or before the “5pm” mark, for that matter?

yeah yeah, that was two questions.  whatever.  i’ve had a no good, very bad day. 

but it would’ve been so much better if i could’ve had a nice glass of crown on the rocks.

scratch that…today deserves a giant fish bowl drink that i could just shove my whole face in and gulped down.  kinda like “bobbing for apples” only it’d be “bobbing for booze”.

oops, did i drink all of that? refill PLEASE!!!!

 

and that leads me to question number 2:  why can’t life be like my favorite book? 

 

every night, before i go to bed, i read for at least 30 min.  it’s how i relax and wind down before sleepy time.  i read a little bit of everything.  from smart kid “aren’t i so hip” books to cheesy romance novels.  but my most favoritest of authors is Robert Heinlein.  i love his work so much that i went on a “reading quest” where i tried to read all of his novels (i think i lack only 4 of them).

 

and right now i’m reading one of his novels, my favorite is The Number of The Beast. 

mine is much more beat-up looking than this...

one of my good friends val gave me a copy in like 7th grade and i have read and re-read it at least 15 times.  the book is dog-eared, the spine is broken, and the cover is starting to come off.  it is a well-loved novel.  a beloved friend. 

and on days like this, i wish i could literally crawl into that book and live there.  i want to be Dr Dejah Thoris Burroughs Carter…a statuesque, strawberry-blonde genius.  she’s got plenty of personality.  she doesn’t take crap from anyone and is able to still maintain a sweet disposition (on a good day, i can do that).  she’s deadly with or without a weapon (i couldn’t defend myself against a fly with a sledgehammer).  she is literally a genius (tooootally not me.  especially today…i am feeling very very dumb.  and worthless.  pity party, table for one!).  added bonus, she’s married to the uber awesome and dreamy Zebadiah John Carter (uber awesome and dreamy guys don’t exist in real life).

 

and if i was Deety (her nickname, duh), i’d do computer programming in my head because i’m a super genius.  and i’d get to explore different universes…like ones where you can live on mars.  and wonderland. and bestest of all…the land of Oz!  i’d get to meet tik-tok, glenda the good, the tin-man, the hungry tiger and the cowardly lion! 

yippee! the land of oz, here i come!!

not to mention that i’d then get to meet Heinlein’s main character, Lazarus Long, and all of his family.  and then get to time travel.

 

*sigh*

 

why can’t i live there?  pretty please, with sugar on top?! 

 please Mr. Heinlein..pretty pretty please…i’ve been a faithful fan for many a years! 

c'mon Heinlein...make it happen!

just until this horrible, no good very bad day is over?  or at least until i can go over to KKs and drown my sorrows and feelings of work-related inadequacies in a giant vat of vodka or crown?

tomorrow, i’ll woman-up and conquer the world.  i promise.  i’ll go out and solve the world’s problems and all that jazz.  

but that’s tomorrow. 

Advertisements

Author: merrycontrary

Greetings! I'm Meredith Black, an Oklahoma City based photographer. Any time I'm behind the camera lens, I'm a happy camper!

2 thoughts on “WHY CAN’T LIFE BE LIKE MY FAVORITE BOOK?!

  1. Oh my sweet Mere Mere,

    I swung by KK’s yesterday to deliver some cooking wine for her shrimp scampi (I am sure it was delicious) and she mentioned how you had had a no good, very bad workday. I am sorry I didn’t get to stick around to lend my ear for the necessary venting and my liver for supportive boozing. (I have a standing date with my man and the Thunder on Wednesday nights) But, I do just want to remind you how amazing you are and that this too shall pass. You are one smart, responsible, funny lady who has her shit together, period. Anyone who says or thinks otherwise either doesn’t really know you or is just plain stupid. I love you friend!

    -Julie

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s